I am Sorry!!!

   Precisely 12hours back I was wide awake and was watching Brazil getting massacred by German team in the world cup semifinal. I put out an FB post asking whether the match was happening in UP, and I thought nothing of it.

   Today one person told me that the post is in a very bad taste. This made me think and I realised that actually I did the same thing that I keep complaining. I was insensitive and casually joking about the most heinous crime in the world. I am man enough to admit that I have committed a sin. It is as inexcusable as actually committing the crime. I know I should apologise, but will it make any difference??

   I just realised that, all the time I have stood up for unknown women in the buses or malls or just about anywhere, doesn't count at all. My one post has wiped all of that! 

   I realised that I too am part of the problem. All the candle light vigils, all the protests, all the things I do to support the victims, doesn't count at all.

   Just am feeling so ashamed of myself that words fail to express the disgust that I am feeling for myself right now!! I think I must SHUT up and just say I am SORRY!!!

Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village, though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it's queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there's some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

And I kept on waiting....

Its 8:15 a.m. and I stand here in the bus stop waiting for the office bus to arrive. I stand here in the same manner as I did a few years back waiting for my college bus. Little did I know then that things would change so much in 6 years; the sky under which I am standing seems to be looking at me and smiling .. It is perhaps the only thing that has acted as a witness .. watching the transformation of a loud and bubbly person into a quiet professional.

I wouldn't blame the professionalism for the change though. It is destiny, or may be you could call it life. Yes Life, esoteric in the true sense, for one does not understand why you meet hundreds of people everyday, work with so many, and still remain lonely.

I am now in one of the corner seats in the bus, looking out of the window watching people trying to catch up with "life" .. It's an hour's journey and the only company that I generally have is the chatter of the RJ. I seldom notice the person sitting next to me, for its going to be yet another stranger or may be you could say another acquaintance. It is annoying at times when the radio is switched off, not because I am cut off from the melody but because I would now be thrust with thoughts of the solitary journey ahead.

I can't help thinking about the short bus journeys to college ... well it's a paradox to call a distance of 30 KMs "short", but that is how it always seemed. A typical college day always begins in the bus with all the familiar faces; you look forward for all your friends to get in from the various stops, the reasonless giggles, the loud laughter that were stifled to avert the eyes of the lecturers and professors who would watch on us as if we were their prospective prey for the day ... well as I said it was a different life then. The pleasant memories of college are in itself good enough to save me from the misery of the bus journey.

I notice that it is time for me to get down and flash my smile of acknowledgement to all the known strangers that I see as I approach my cubicle. A few of my colleagues greet me with their morning wishes and as always, we exchange our pleasantries. Discussions jump to the weekend plans and I wonder what I'd do over the weekend.

It would be just another day staring at the mobile, wishing it would ring and bring back some wonderful moments that are now missing in life or maybe the safer option would be to come to office, for it's my new founded asylum these days. A few years back, weekends or weekdays didn't matter to me, I was always busy. I always stood doubting the authenticity of the wall clock that seemed to be in running too fast to perceive its movement. Alas, now it seems as though my clock is suffering from some kind of paralytic attack.

There is a time in life, where one needs to go ahead, leaving behind your friends and carrying along only memories. You do make new friends, but then you never get the old close ones ... you do meet people who'd be so good to you that you could tell them anything and everything, but you do not find a person to whom you needn't say things ... friends who just know you. Occasional calls from such friends, have been the only thing that I seem to look forward to ...However, I cant help but notice the uneasy pause that lingers around the conversation ..A pause not because of the relationship, but because it is too short a duration to say everything, and of course you cannot completely rule out the paucity of words!

As I sip coffee from the ubiquitous coffee mug, watching the drops of rain, trickling down the tinted glass panes, veiling the scenic beauty outside, I tell myself, may be there will be a day when things will change, when life will offer a rewind, a recap of all the events and I just have to wait.

Capricious are the ways of life, for I know there would be many who'd be able to empathize with me, ironically, even the dear ones that I miss this moment, waiting perhaps...!!

And I keep on waiting......

My Boss...

1. My Boss has learned to be cautious. Failure taught him that.
2. My Boss isn't a total failure. His Boss helped too.
3. If ever we need to simulate a problem, we invite my Boss to the meeting.
4. Normally we don't except sloppy work, but we make an exception for my Boss.
5. My Boss decided to put his memoirs in a book. Its called 'My Defecations'.
6. If my Boss was a energy plant, he'd be a 'power failure'.
7. My Boss is in court for sexual harassment. He said it was a 'pat on the back.'
8. My Boss returned from his evaluation looking very sad. He said "I can't figure out why my Boss hates me. I haven't done anything."
9. My Boss' business philosophy is "You can fool enough of the people some of the time."
10. My Boss doesn't mind work. Its thinking that scares him.
11. Comments on the first day from my new Boss "Over the years I've trained 3 people who eventually became my Boss. I guarantee that's not going to happen to you."
12. My Boss canceled the weekly status meetings on a project long overdue. She said "Every week its the same thing. Let's wait until something happens, before we meet again."
13. I interviewed with a company and then didn't hear back for over a month. I had written them off, and was surprised to get a phone call from my Boss-to-be, asking if I was still interested in the position. When I said, "yes," he said, "good, because our first two choices got better offers."
14. In their absence, management left my Boss in charge. They wanted to see the 'worst case scenario.'
15. My Boss recently joined my car pool. I now know, I can lead my Boss to work, but I can't make him think.
16. "Yes, I've read your proposal, but I can't support concepts before management's review." Typical political maneuvers by my Boss.
17. "I really love that spreadsheet. I did 10 what-ifs and I liked them all." Comment after seeing his pie-in-the-sky sales forecasts.
18. My Boss recently completed 'Excel for Dummies". Now, the rest of us are reading "The Dummy Unleashed."
19. Management posted a flyer, on the employee bulletin board, supporting a $0.00/hr minimum wage. They claimed that even an employee earning $0.00/hr, benefits from the experience of work and the learning process. Frankly, I earn a salary and I don't see the benefit.
20. As hard as it is to believe, my Boss has a will of his own. His attorney wrote it.

Solitude!!

No words!!!
:)

Back after a long time...

Finally it comes… Someone posted a comment as to why no post from me for a long time!

Yes it has been a long time. I don’t know why but I was not in a proper frame of mind to write or do anything worthwhile. I gave up analyzing the reason when I found that it was leading me nowhere.

So what have I been up to in the recent times? A lot and nothing! Here goes…

I became friends with Mr. A., a friend of a very good friend, Mr. V, a jovial, nice kid with a large heart and an ever-ready smile on his face. Mr. L, another friend of Mr. V, landed from Singapore and became one of us. Both of them are delightful characters and maybe someday I’ll have a post entirely on them.

Meanwhile, Mr. AB, room-mate of mine, returned from the US of A, There were lots to talk and hear. He had a rocking time for 8 months there, though by his own admission he was a bit bored and tired towards the end.

Another room-mate was getting married, so there was some work that we had to do. We needed to help him set-up his new home. All started with my trip to Chennai where I went to Saravana Stores (shopping paradise, if you can somehow bear the heat and humidity) and bought things required for the kitchen. When back in Bangalore, I accompanied him to Shivajinagar to buy the essentials. Two double cots with beds and pillows, a glass dining table with four chairs, a 3+1+1 sofa set with centre table and a TV stand. All for a cool 35K, nice bargain! Then there was this trip for his marriage (which happened to be in Kannur), I got busy in the planning and execution. The trip was enjoyable and fun with 8 of us traveling in a tempo traveler. It was fun all the way to and back! Another trip that I won’t be forgetting in a hurry!

Then there was another marriage, Mr. S, an ex-colleague and a great friend was getting married and I attended the function. Met some friends and colleagues from a time when I was more reckless and carefree. Have to say time changes people and people change with time. It was nice feeling not to feel envious or jealous or happy or sad to see the changes. Maybe as I said sometime ago, I have made peace with myself.

All along the rigors of routine office chores, I must admit I am not as driven as I was probably 2-3 years ago. I have more time to spend on myself now, which was not the case earlier. But I used to love those times when I spent most of the time in the office actually WORKING. Nowadays I work in the office. J

Another thing that kept me busy was the house hunting. We wanted to shift from the place that we have currently rented to a new place. One is that we are sort of bored of this place; secondly the rent has been increased, whereas in all the other places the rent has been decreased.

Now I am planning for another road trip this coming weekend. J

More about it soon.

All Hail! Champions are back…….

For the past few days I am excited by the news of Michael Schumacher back in a F1 cockpit. In midst of this excitement, I asked myself this question, “what is it that makes heroes who leave the field, come back?” History has been filled with such examples:

- Andreas Nikolaus "Niki" Lauda raced in F1 from 1971 to 1979, retired and came back in 1982 and went on to win the championship in 1984 and then retire again in 1985.

- Lance Amstrong, raced till he was diagnosed of Cancer in 1996, makes a comes back in 1998 fully conquering the cancer and retires in 2005. He comes back from retirement in 2009 and wins.

- Closer home, Souvrav Ganguly, dropped in 1992 due to attitude problems, comes back with a maiden century on debut at Lords, goes on to lead the Indian cricket team. Dropped due to rift with coach in 2005, makes a comeback in 2006 and retiring in 2008.

- Monica Seles dominated tennis till 1993 when she was stabbed, then she comes back in 1995 to take part in pro tennis and wins many afterwards.

- Jennifer Capriati, "the poster child for burned-out sports prodigies," to quote the Chicago Sun-Times, comes back in 1996 after her battle with personal problems.

There are many more, I just picked up what I remembered, not to forget Amitabh Bachchan for his innumerable comebacks or Diego Maradona or Andre Agassi or Stephen Hawking or Sergei Bubka or Goran Ivanišević et. al.

What do these people have to prove to anybody for that matter? What is it that drives them?? They have been there and done that, is it the lure of money, fame or power that draws them back? Money for some yes, but that is not a convincing argument. Fame and power, maybe!

What I felt is that these people are champions in their own right and there is a burning frenzy that always drove them. They had the desire to excel and that is what drives them.

Whatever it takes, I am just happy and inspired to watch these heroes of mine… win or fail, they still will be my heroes...

So….

All Hail! Champions are back…….

Nostalgia

I was in Chennai for the last one week. for the uninformed, Chennai is the place where my Mom stays and works and I am in Bangalore, working. I went there after a really long time and that too for a week on leave. I have literally never done that after I started working. The only times I have been in chennai for more than 3-4 days is when I was ill, when I went for my brother's marriage or when I work from there.

My brother has been married for seven months now and he felt that he had to have a place of his own and they shifted to an apartment. Mom had sentiments and feelings attached to the place that she is staying (which I might add is our own house), so she decided against moving with my brother. I have been asking her to come and stay with me in Bangalore for eons, but she refuses to do so! Why?? Well probably coz of the following:

--I am single.

--I am a workaholic and spend more than necessary hours at the office.

--She doesn't know many people here and whomever she knows stays pretty far from where I stay (and most of you know how hard it is to commute in Bangalore)

--She has a job (as a primary teacher) and she doesn't want to leave it and come here.

--She has spent enough time travelling from one place to another very frequently (Dad was a central Govt. Employee and we used to be transferred almost once in two years)

--All her brothers and people she has known all her life stay pretty closeby, so close that there is only a door separating my uncles and their families (who are still a joint family) and her.

--My brother needs someone to take care of him (that is what she always told me), coz he doesn't even know to make a tea (not that I blame him, he was always provided for!).

These are some of reasons that I fathom. I have never liked anyone forcing their opinions on me, so I have never forced anyone with my opinions. So I never really asked Mom why she did not want to come and stay with me. I thought, maybe when the time was right, she'll just come.

So coming back, I was in Chennai in our spatial house with nobody (Mom goes to school you see) and practically nothing to do. So what do I do???

Chennai is so hot at any given time of the year, that you don't feel like getting out, so I cooked whenever I could, which happened to be 3 days in the week. Without being modest, I must say that I am a pretty decent cook. One of the days my uncle was celebrating his birthday and I cooked Chicken Dum Biriyani for 50 people.

After all this I still had lots of time in my hand, it is then that I started going through the junk that had been collected over the years. Some of the things that I saw in them:

-- A trophy that I won in LKG/UKG for being the best student.

-- An oxford english dictionary I got in 1st standard for topping the class.

-- A Wren and Martin that I got when i was in 2nd standard as professiancy prize.

-- Aesop's fables and Dean's book of fairy tales that my Dad gave me after I stood in the top 3 in 3rd.

-- A Tale of Two Cities that my neighbour gifted to me when I was in fourth.

-- My first pen that I used to write in fifth, till then we used pencils.

-- The first letter that my granny wrote to me when i was in Chennai.

-- A piece of a wooden scale that broke when my Mom hit me with it.

-- My first Autograph book from sixth, wherein John madam, Chella madam, Krishna sir and Pattammal madam had signed.

-- My very first love letter that I got from Nirupama, I was in sixth at that time.

-- The pen that my close and probably the first best friend Rajnikanth made for me. Yes he made it from and old razor.

-- My second autograph book, this was from Port Blair, I was in seventh at that time.

-- A sea-shell that I took from the ocean when I went scuba-diving in Chidiyatapu, Andaman.

-- A little soil from the Cellular Jail, safe in a packet.

-- A feather of a pigeon, which died. I fought with 4 people in my class, in seventh, for saving the life of that bird, coz they were throwing stones at it.

-- The first ten rupee note that Dad gave me to enjoy, coz I stood 5th in a class of 45 people.

-- The very first diary that I wrote in the year 1994.

-- The first speech that I gave in a new school KV,Dharwad just 5 days after joining there.

-- Some of the poems that I wrote in ninth.

-- An essay that my teacher Mr. Bondekar sir made me read in the class as an example of how not to get carried away during an exam. He did mention that it was a very good piece of work, but just not for an exam.

-- The second love letter that I got in my life.

-- A momento for being a compere for the Annual day function.

-- A Lord Krishna wall hanging for winning some competions held during the farewell party, in tenth.

-- My tenth standard hall ticket.

-- Lots of Hearbeat chocolate wrappers that someone special ate during 11th.

-- A handkerchief that I gave to her and she returned, it is still untouched and safe. :)

-- A note where she called me a flirt.

-- The first cycle chain that I used, not for the cycle though.

-- A 4"x4" sorry note, where she wrote SORRY, a thousand times.

-- A small piece of pencil.

-- Letters that she wrote to me in 12th and thereafter, coz she was away from me.

-- Letters that her sister (my Rakhi sister) wrote to me.

-- My 12th standard hall ticket.

-- A packet of lead balls, that I used to try to kill myself.

-- A hand written note from a Spastic guy, who taught me the meaning of life in a single encounter of 5 hours.

-- My CET hall ticket.

-- Some booklets that I made during college days for my classes.

-- A CD of my very old documents, that I treasured at that time. The CD is not readable anymore.

-- My first paycheque (I got it when I was in first year of my college, never cashed it though!).

-- A certificate and a pen for organizing the VLSI conference during 3rd year.

-- Yet another love letter.

-- A trophy for being the best outgoing student of my department.

-- Printout of a heart to heart conversation with my ex-gf during college.

-- Dad's last purse with a ten rupee note.

-- A certificate for organizing the CAPS workshop after the college.

-- A certificate for successfully completing and executing SRiSHTI-ATE.

-- Dozens of certificates over the 2+16 years of formal education for extra-curricular, sports and academic achievements.

-- Small tokens of love given by my recent ex-girl friend.

Well all these made my entire life, till now flash before my eyes in slow motion, is it what we call nostalgia?? Or is it re-living your life again!!

I dunno, just was happy with the bitter-sweet memories! I would say, I have lived my life till now without any regrets. All I did was the best I could do at that time, maybe today, I might not do it the same way. But no regrets whatsoever.

I LOVE my life!!!

:)

Letting Go

I have had people telling me all my life to "let go"!

I read someplace "If you want to be at peace, if you want to feel the love of God in your heart, if you want to savor the present moment, then just let go of all the constraints you have put upon yourself.”

It is so simple, is it not? Yes to someone who says, it is, but to practice what you preach, is it that simple??

All these years,

· I have held on to my desires.

· I have held on to what I thought I needed.

· I have held on to whatever promised me happiness.

· I have held on to my possessions.

· I have held on to my image of who I am.

· I have held on to my ideas of what is right.

· I have held on to my theories.

· I have held on to my beliefs.

· I have held on to my attitudes.

· I have held on to my judgments.

· I have held on to the past.

· I have held on to the future.

· I have held on to relationships.

· I have held on to material things.

· I have held on to my grievances.

· I have held on to my fears.

· I have held on to my loves.

· I have held on to my lovers.

· I have held on to money.

· I have held on to my thoughts.

· I have held on to my illusions.

· I have held on to memories.

· Last, but not the least, I have held on to my life.

Is this wrong?? I don’t know! I have always had a sense of security (maybe false, maybe real) by holding on!! To put it simply, I was scared to let go! I read a story where a climber holds on to a rope for his dear life, when GOD asks him to let go. He doesn’t listen and holds on. Next day his corpse is found by rescuers, holding on to the rope, just two feet above the ground.

It all depends, I feel, some ropes are necessary to hold, but many others can and should be let go.

Past couple of weeks has been a real eye-opener of sorts and I have figured out some of the ropes that I have to let go. I am now feeling more liberated and at peace with myself.

I do not have a constant turmoil inside me.

I smile a lot, not the superficial smile I always wear, but a genuine smile.

I am not fighting myself over things I do not like, but still have to do.

I am not frustrated if things do not go my way.

For those of you who know me well, I have got missed calls in the night! Yes, I have slept and did not pick up the calls. For those of who don’t know me so well, I have a bad habit of picking up any call I get, even when I am asleep, I wake up to receive that call, even if my phone just vibrates! JEarlier, the only time I have not picked up calls was when I was medicated to sleep!

So I guess it helps to let go, but not all the things....

:)

Wishing, You Loved Me Again . .

Ask me, just one more time

To be yours, for ever more
To share, for better or worse
And this time I won't let you go.

 

Tell me, just one more time
That you dream of me, and nothing else
That without me, you're incomplete
And this time, I won't be such a fool.

 

Hear me, just one more time
Forget all that I said before,
Why, I do not know
But now, I really want you back.

 

Look back just one more time,
See the smile fade away,
See these eyes longing,
Wishing you loved me again . . 

Mango mood......

I woke up on Saturday morning (1100hrs) and had this big urge to eat mango! After my morning ablution, I went out to the friendly supermarket and bought a kilogram of mango. There was around 5 of them in it. I had 3 of them before 1300hrs, so did not feel like eating brunch. Then I set about the task of finishing "The Appeal" by Grisham (I was reading it for a long time). Finally by around 1730hrs I was done and I started to watch the F1 qualifying. I set out now to eat the other two mangoes that was left out. It was really delicious. 

Now I was out of mangoes and wanted more. But the qualifying was on and I had to wait till it got over. Ferrari qualified 2nd and 5th.Was not really pleased with the results but was happy.

I went out the supermarket (I still have no idea why it is called a supermarket), and saw bottled fresh mango juice. I bought them and came home when a bright idea stuck me!! I had vodka in my house and I mixed it with teh mango juice that I got and kept it in the refrigerator.

I went out to the corner juice shop and ordered a mango milk shake. Then I had a mango mousse and I was starting to get bored with my mango mania. I decided enough was enough and bought another kilogram of mangoes and came back home and finished the VODKA-MANGO drink that was in the refrigerator. I ate the mangoes that I got for dinner and went to sleep thinking..... 

"What tomorrow? Oranges, Peaches, Strawberries, Pineapples or just plain Apples??"

True friendship!!!

A mail that I got from a friend of mine..... Was funny and nice, so thought of sharing with y'all.

Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?
Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card - Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship. 
1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid. 
4. When you are scared -- I will take the piss out of you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining. 
6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.
7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want catch whatever you have.
8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at you. 
9. This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end.
"Why?" you may ask; "because you are my friend".
Friendship is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth. 
( Thanks for being the piss in my pants)
Send this to "all 10" of your friends, then get depressed because you can only think of four!!!
(And don't send it back to me.... I don't want to hear it!!!) 

Luv & Rgds

WHAT IS MARRIAGE a 30 point answer?

 I have tried to compile this just for fun......

1. Marriage is not a word. It's a sentence (a life sentence). 

2. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution fo the blind. 

3. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her masters.

4. Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring and suffeRING. 

5. Married life is full of excitement and frustration: In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.In the third year, they both speak and the NEIGHBOUR listens. 

6. Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.You order what you want, and when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that instead. 

7. There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced. 

8. A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes. 

9. Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad? Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it. 

10. Son: Is it true Dad? I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her. Father: That happens everywhere, son, EVERYWHERE! 

11. Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock. 

12. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense. 

13. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a 10-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. 

14. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going through HELL. 

16. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. 

17. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America, the rest cheat in Europe. 

18. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin. They just can't face each other, but they still stay together. 

19. Marriage is man and a woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one. 

20. Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After the marriage the "Y" becomes silent. 

21. I married Miss right; I just didn't know her first name was Always. 

22. It's not true that married men live longer than single men, it only seems longer. 

23. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. 

24. A man was complaining to a friend: I HAD IT ALL-MONEY, A BEAUTIFUL HOUSE, THE LOVE OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THEN POW! IT WAS ALL GONE. WHAT HAPPENED, asked his friend. He says MY WIFE FOUND OUT. 

25. WIFE: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. HUSBAND: OK, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway lighs on. 

26. At a cocktail party, one woman said to another: AREN'T YOU WEARING YOUR RING ON THE WRONG FINGER? The other replied, YES, I, AM. I MARRIED THE WRONG MAN. 

27. Man is incomplete until he gets married, then he is finished. 

28. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss. 

29. A man inserted an ad in the paper - WIFE WANTED. The next day he received a hundred of letters and they all said the same thing - YOU CAN HAVE MINE. 

30. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing - either the car is new or the wife is.

 

Disclaimer: The points here have been collected from various emails that I have got over years and may or maynot be my opinions

Foot Prints....

I read this somewhere....

One day a man having conversation with god when his whole life flashed before his eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. He saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult periods of his life there were only one set of footprints. He asked god "You said you will be with me throughout this journey, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of my life??" To which god answered "Son, I did not desert you, I was always with you...you see only one set of footprints because during those difficult times in your life, I was carrying you" 

Now the version applicable to me and people like me....
Another day I was having a similar conversation with my Project Manager (PM) when my whole project flashed before my eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. I saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult times in the project there were only one set of footprints. I asked my PM, "You said you will be with me throughout the project, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of the project??" to which my PM answered, "Son, I did not desert you, I was always with you... you see only one set of footprints because during those difficult times I was "sitting on your head!!!"

The Curious case of doctors...

I am sick!!! Not the "sick", which I know some of you would say I am, but physically unwell. I have been like this for a week now. And I hate to be 'physically unwell'.

I hate to go to doctors, in spite of me scolding all the people I know who do not go to a doctor when they are unwell. It is really difficult to practice what you preach in this case for me. So I stayed at home and tried the usual stuff that most of us would do, took d'cold (paracetamol 300mg, Pseudoephedrine 36mg  and Triprolidine 1.5mg) and the very trusted Benadryl (Diphenhydramine Hydrochloride 12.5mg, Ammonium Chloride 125mg, Sodium Citrate 50mg). It went on for 2 days and no respite. Then I changed to coldact (Fenilpropanolamine hydrochlorate 50 mg, Chlorfeniramin maleat 8 mg) and Benadryl, for next two days. Still no respite. Then I decided, it is high time and I went to see a doctor, Mr. S Medicinewala (name changed to protect his identity).

Dr.: So what is the problem??

Me: I have been having sore throat, dry cough and running/blocked nose for past 4 days. I feel feverish too, though the temperature is around 99-100. Have been taking paracetamol and drinking Benadryl.

Dr.: So how long has it been??

Me: I think I said 4 days..

Dr.: So what did you do??

Me: Sorry??

Dr.: I mean what medications have you been taking??

Me: Sorry doc, but did I not just mention all that to you??

Dr.: Oh! yes you did. 

He puts on his stethoscope and tells "Breathe in and out"

When I do it, he is like " No no no...! Breeeaaaaathee in and breeeaathee out"

Me: Oh, you mean take a deep breath in and exhale slowly??

Dr.: Yes!! Good boy, good boy!!

I was shocked, this guy who is the doc, is probably around my age, maybe younger and he is like "good boy" to me. I generally use that word for my dog, when he does what I ask him to do!! I was imagining myself as a doggie with a collar around my neck and instantly smiled (wonders that can happen when you are physically unwell, imagination running wild).

Then he makes me go through the routine "Open you mouth" " Show Aaaaaaaaaa" etc..

And then he says, it is just a viral infection, will prescribe some medicines and you'll be right as rain!!

I thank him and pay his fees. Man, these guys sure are costly, he charged a little more than what I get paid for a day, as salary, for the time that he spent with me, which is like less than 6 mins.

I buy the tablets prescribed by him and come home. Will not name the tablets here as I am afraid of being sued by the pharmaceutical company. You'll soon know why. There were two tablets, one was pure Paracetamol 500mg, with some added colors and the other tablet had the composition similar to D'cold.

I really don't know what to say here. he charges me money for prescribing me the same tablets that I anyways was having, albiet from a different manufacturer. I ate the tablets that he prescribed, just coz I had paid the money to buy 'em. 

Is this a case of looting. I felt so powerless to do anything about it. If this happens to educated people like us, I was wondering what would be the case with people who are medically illiterate. I mean just how many of us bother about looking at the composition of the tablets that we take??

I don't know what to say after this, other than the fact that I felt cheated and duped......

Random thought

" Nothing prevents us from being natural, so much as the desire to appear so"

Jai Sri Ram...

I was reading through my friend’s blogpost the other day and felt I should also write about it. Was held up with a little work and the words just wouldn’t take shape in the mind. But now….

 Firstly as an answer to what The Mad Hatter (I actually have no idea why he chose that pseudo name, but I am assuming it is because he is someone who wears all the de Bono Hats, and wears them quite intelligently) says, Sri Ram would have approved. Now before people get me wrong, I have some things to add.

n      Sri Ram’s army (Sene, Sena whatever) was that of monkeys (no disrespect intended).

n      Sri Ram was the person who asked Mata Sita to give agni pariksha.

 So IMAO, the Sri Rama Sene would do nothing but whatever monkeys do best, and also it has to be the women folk who disrespect INDIAN CULTURE by pubbing.

 There is a lot of talk about western culture influencing young people, pubbing culture being rampant etc. etc. by many so called protectors of the Indian culture. I have but a simple question to these people, what do you mean by culture? These people have no respect for anything and they call themselves protectors! J Anyways, as the hatter puts it, it is probably the Fatwa envy that has been the cause of all these recent bad and petty quarrels.

 Why is it that everyone wants to tell us what we should and should not?

n      There are these religious fanatics who will define the ways we pray.

n      There is this minister who tells us what to eat and what to drink.

n      There are censor board people who will decide what should go into a movie and what is not appropriate.

n      There are these so called moral police who will decide what we should wear.

n      Then there are some commentators who have not played a single test and commenting on a Sachin, Ganguly and Dravid’s batting.

There are lot many more than I could care to write. Is it that all of us are retarded (I guess that is the correct word), that we always need someone to think for us.

This is to all of us…..

PS: All the opinions are my own and I think I am entitled to it as is anyone else to theirs. Just for the record I am not a Hindu basher or a leftist or a right winger or a pseudo secularist and my political inclining and my religion is my own choice and I need not make a public statement on it!! J

Kanua???

Well, what does Kanua mean?? I frankly had no idea, till I went to this restaurant.

This one is a concept restaurant situated in Kaikondrahalli, Sarjapur Road. It is the perfect place you want to go, with your parents, spouse, friends or alone... :)

I was taken there first by my friend Mr. "D " and have gone there umpteen number of times afterwards. I have really fallen in love with the place.

After the mad traffic into Sarjapur road, taking the first right after Fabmall and driving through a dirt track you come to this place on the right side of the road, a three storied building near an industrial warehouse. If you go there after sunset, this place has a eerie look to it. The restaurant is located on the second floor and you have to climb through a wooden staircase.

The first thing you notice when you start to climb the stairs is a board which says something like " Dear Patrons, children below 12 years will not be allowed after 6pm Thursday onwards...." (I must say I have seen a lot of kids coming to this place though, along with their parents).

The walls are only half height and if you get to sit at the side (which is most of them, except for the huge tables in the centre), you’ll have a cool breeze to keep you company. The lighting is muted and there are candles on every table. The music is soft and not too loud. Pleasant and soothing! I never had that kind of feeling before in a restaurant, the eating area is without walls and the décor is definitely what I remember from my childhood in my village. The doors open into two, there is woodwork everywhere and the tables and chairs too are from age old days (I mean only look-wise).

The menu card will definitely amuse you; it is like an old book with stamps in every page. Do not mistake them for stamps as they are the specials!! The menu describes to you what the various highly confusing and tongue-twisting names are so that you are not lost. Also the waiting staffs are very cordial and very helpful.

Alcohol is not served in this place, though regulars like us take a small bottle with us and give it to be served. Also it does not have aerated drinks there. There are quite a few beverages that will blow you off. There is sugarcane juice, lemon with mint iced tea so on and so forth, but trust me they all taste pleasantly different.

There is a wide range of starters in both vegetarian and non-vegetarian. I would recommendpodhies, try both the flavors, podhale podhies, made of snake gourd and normal podhies made of sweet potato and/or yam. Then there is Soorna Kachri (sliced yam fries, with tangy tamarind chutney dip). If you are a non-vegetarian, try the fish and the chicken all of them are too good. Sasve chicken and ghee roast deserve a special mention.

For main course I recommend Zalke Randhei (excellent seer fish in semi thick gravy) and Soorna Paachi. With the gravy you can select from rice, panpole or tava roti. Kanua serves two varieties of rice - the standard Basmati type and boiled. I personally love the neer-dosas there. It is simply mind blowing.

Almost all the portions are large and many a times I have ended up parceling the curries back home. The parcel is done in plastic containers, but the carry bag is not plastic, it is made of old newspapers. J

The best part is that there are no artificial colors or chemicals used in any of the preparations. All the things that I have eaten there (which by now is the entire menu card), I have enjoyed and it is good on the palette too. Now coming to the wallet part, it is not a place where only filthy rich can go. Compared to the other sea-food places in MG or Koramangala, this one is pretty decent. An above average meal with five to six starters and main course for three with four to five coolers should cost around Rs.2000/-.

If you drop in the evening and stay on till 9pm you might even bump into Mr. Rajesh, who actually is the owner and he’ll enthrall you with his stories as to what he does and how he came upon the idea of Kanua. A very nice and charming person!!

He mentioned that he has started another restaurant “EGG FACTORY” at White House, St. Marks road. That again is a concept place and has lots of dishes with eggs, right from breakfast to dinner. I forgot to mention that at Kanua you do not get breakfast and it is closed on Mondays.

Now what exactly is Kanua, I believe it means par-boiled brown rice, kind of a lost flavor of rice from south canara….

Near death.....

On Sunday (28^th December, 08) on my way back from Chennai in a car along with my friends we met with an accident. Our car hit a road divider and flew for around 150m in air and then fell on to the road and skidded with a broken right front tyre for another 300m.  All this happened in a span of few seconds, but I felt like I was in the air for and eternity!! There were four of us in the car including the guy who was driving and a brand new guitar that my friend had brought for around seven grand. The best part was none of us including the guitar had any damage! J The car was not so lucky; it had a broken tyre, a bent fender and a bent tyre rod, just to name a few.

 What prompted me to write this was the near death experience, I mean if the car had toppled (it probably would have if we did not have a 220 pound driver), then people would have been writing obituaries for me (high hopes!) rather than me writing this post. I went through a whole gamut of emotions during those few seconds and was wondering if I was the only one who went through it. So as soon as I was out of the shock (which I must say took more than 24 hours), I started to search the internet to find out more about it.

I must say, I was surprised and amused by the results that I found. I got to know that they even have a research foundation named NDERF (Near Death Experience Research Foundation), wherein people share their experiences and they do a lot of research on that. Why?? I have no clue..

Also there is a page in wikipedia (there is a page for almost everything in Wikipedia), where the NDE is described in real detail along with characteristics and what not. Boy.. wasn’t I surprised?

It really is a small world…… full of weird people...

My Marriage.....

Well, this post certainly is not an invitation to attend my marriage!!! As and when it gets decided, I'll let you people know personally!! The inspiration to write this post is my MOM!!

I have come to Chennai, (a city which I hate for its weather) and it is not even 24 hours when my Mom decides to assault me with pictures of eligible brides. Fair and beautiful all of them. I am actually spoilt for choices.

What is the right time to get married? I have been grappling with this question for sometime to find an answer. I am a kind of person who will not interfere into another's life unless and until I am specifically asked to. Because, I believe that we are all grown ups and know how to handle things. Whenever I stumble, I learn, whenever I need help, I ask!! Life has been that simple for me and I do not try to make it any more complicated.

So now coming back to the question, when and whom should I get married to?? Well for me some things are very important:

-- Both of us must have love for each other and know each other very well.

-- Trust for each other.

-- Both of us should know to handle and should handle responsibilities.

-- We should be with each other through thick and thin.

-- Both should have the same value systems.

I don't ask for much but I think these are quite an important requisite.

What kinda freaks me out is the fact that this decision that is going to effect my entire life, no wait my, my parents their parents, my children's and possible their children's lives is to be taken in 2 or 3 meetings!!!!!Man this is seems like it is straight out of a Spielberg movie!!!

Hats off to all you happily married couples out there!!!!

Till I find the answers to these questions or find someone I think marriage can wait... 

Maybe in this life or the next I'll find.....