PEG AFTER PEG

Read this a really long time ago someplace, hopefully have been able to recall it properly..

 I never take risk while drinking

When I come from office in the evening, wife is cooking
I can hear the noise of utensils in the kitchen
I stealthily enter the house
Take out the bottle from my black cupboard 
Shivaji Maharaj is looking at me from the photo frame
But still no one is aware of it
Becoz I never take a risk

 I take out the glass from the rack above the old sink
Quickly enjoy one peg
Wash the glass and again keep it on the rack 
Of course I also keep the bottle inside my cupboard
Shivaji Maharaj is giving a smile

 I peep into the kitchen
Wife is cutting potatoes
No one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk

 I: Any news on Iyer's daughter's marriage
Wife: Nope, she doesn't seem to be that lucky. Still they are looking out for 
her

I again come out; there is a small noise of the black cupboard
But I don't make any sound while taking out the bottle 
I take out the glass from the old rack above sink
Quickly enjoy one peg

 Wash the bottle and keep it in the sink
Also keep the Black Glass in the cupboard
But still no one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk 

I: But still I think Iyer's daughter's age is not that much
Wife: What are you saying? She is 28 yrs old... like an aged horse
I: (I forgot her age is 28) Oh Oh...

 I again take out potatoes out from my black cupboard 
But the cupboard's place has automatically changed
I take out the bottle from the rack and quickly enjoy one peg in the sink

 Shivaji Maharaj laughs loudly
I keep the rack in the potatoes & wash Shivaji Maharaj's photo & keep it in 
the black cupboard

 Wife is keeping the sink on the stove
But still no one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk

 I: (getting angry) you call Mr. Iyer a horse? If you say that again, I will 
cut your tongue...!
Wife: Don't just blabber something, go out and sit quietly...

I take out the bottle from the potatoes
Go in the black cupboard and enjoy a peg
Wash the sink and keep it over the rack 
Wife is giving a smile

 Shivaji Maharaj is still cooking
But still no one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk

 I: (laughing) So Iyer is marrying a horse!!
Wife: Hey go and sprinkle some water on your face... 

 I again go to the kitchen, and quietly sit on the rack
Stove is also on the rack
There is a small noise of bottles from the room outside

I peep and see that wife is enjoying a peg in the sink
But none of the horses are aware of what I did 
Becoz Shivaji Maharaj never takes a risk

 Iyer is still cooking
And I am looking at my wife from the photo and laughing
Becoz I never take what???